LINGMERE 13/5/18

ATTACK OF HELMETITUS CONFIRMED AT LINGMERE

There has been a suspicion for a while that Eggy Ferry A.S has a number of Helmets as members.
Unfortunately I have to confirm this suspicion after the act of Gross Helmetry witnessed at Lingmere yesterday .
It was not one of the usual suspects ( Sumo , Patto , Nicky , Terry,  Cookie ) who was guilty but our very own Match Secretary Davey Harrop.
Having drawn peg 9 Dave was not happy and introduced a seldom used tactic to improve his chances. He decided to use the Rover Peg . This means getting in the boat ( as pictured ) and drifting round the lake catching fish from everbody's peg. Last used by Captain Ahab in the harpooning of Moby Dick the tactic appeared to work but after a 4lb carp Dave felt seasick and had to return to his peg.
Joking apart Dave lost half his pole after hooking a fish and after a number of rescue attempts with Pole and Feeder rods the boat was the only answer .
Well done the lads for letting the boat go in , I expect some other clubs would not have allowed it and let a valuable bit of kit vanish forever , well in the Eggy Ferry .
Regarding the match some found it hard and some found it easy . With a few regulars missing there was plenty of room and I never heard the "BOXED IN " moan once.
In four sections the winner today was Andy Lawton. Continuing after last weeks win Andy put 85lb of mainly F1's to the scales.
Andy on peg 29 started on the feeder with groundbait and dead maggots. Catching from the off he then swapped throughout the day between shallow , monging and on the deck with caster , then back to the feeder to seal the win. Having sat next to Andy on peg 31 it was an absolute pleasure to have my arse kicked by such a nice man. Well done Andy.
I second place again this week was the club fell runner Bucko . John drew peg 5 and was sandwiched between Terry and Les ( sometimes known as a Lard Sandwich ) .Despite being egged on by the two for the duration of the match Bucko weighed 76-14 for the section .
In third place after a trip to Tunnel Barn , Dave Edwards showed he can do it when on a decent peg. Dave caught all day on pole and soft pellet .His trick was keep the fish on the deck .He did this by heavy feeding as soon as line bites , foul hookers appeared. The scales read 69-8 for third and the section . In C Section Dennis on peg 19 ( same as he was on Wednesday ) completed the section winners with a catch of 52-13 . Fortunately I had the island between me and Dennis but the breeze brought a few moans over all the same .
Another bonus this week was the absence of Sumo . After another weekend of giving his hard earned cash away to poor old penioners at the GCAOTY and Fisho he had no petrol money left and visited Lingmere by bike.
So in Summary

1st Andy
2nd Bucko
3rd Dave Edwards

Sections
A Bucko
B Dennis
C Dave
D Andy

Congratulations to the framers and the section winners

I have left this part till the end just so we can all reminisce over the fun and laughs we have every time we get out fishing .I write this because of the news about Ray Jackson passing away.
He loved the fishing and the banter and was a true character and will be missed by all .
Also at  the moment Kenny Stuart is in Hospital and we all wish him a speedy recovery , get well soon Ken.
Lets get out an the banks lads and have more fun and games. We have a great bunch of blokes in the club and have a great time every time we meet up.

Cheers boys see you soon

Cookie

Partridge Spey and Ribbon 6/5/18

All is calm again with the Eggy Ferry lads after the Facebook Bull**** poster Sumo is silenced at Partridge.

After another week of constant drunken facebook posts the self proclaimed Prince of Partridge was shown how to do it by Andy and Bucko.
Thirteen of us made the trip and we had two lakes to fish on .
Spey lake had two sections on it consisting of a section of three and one of four. Ribbon had two sections of three and it was D section that provided the winning weight Andy was this weeks champ putting 75-04 in the sling .Andy caught shallow all day on Ribbon which turned out to fish a lot harder than Spey.
On Spey  Bucko announced his return and the subsequent arse kicking of Sumo with 69-15  caught long , short and down the track with pellet. This was enough for 2nd place and the section .
In B section despite having his ego knocked (at last )Sumo caught 52.03 for third place and the section,beating Patto by a mere 12 ounces. Hard luck Neil.
By the way Sumo  was on the same peg that Mr Crabtree had 297lb in the 1957 fisho qualifier.
On Ribbon in C section Housey made it three wins in a row in the most difficult section. Phil had 15-11 to take the money . Phil , your on a roll mate , keep it going.
A slight dampener on proceedings was the withdrawal of Gary from the match .After a skinful of ale and multiple kebabs on saturday night the master of mirth was confined to lying on the bank to sleep it off (been there myself )
Despite the weather and the fish starting to spawn it was a nice days fishing on a well kept and organised fishery.
Well done Andy and welcome back Bucko . Sumo has gone into facebook silence this week thank god but it doesn't stop me giving him the title the Spaz of Spey for this week.
Whilst doing the weigh in we were informed by Sumo that he would be doing a youtube video of how to get fish out of the net and into the sling properly as we were all amateurs I suggested that he might be better doing a video of hanging himself which was seconded by Bucko .

So in Summary

1st Andy
2nd Bucko
3rd Sumo

Sections
A Bucko
B Sumo
C Housey
D Andy

Congratulations the the framers and section winners
If you read this lads we have booked some of the best lakes on the best fisheries we have ever been on . Lets try and make the effort to get out to them and make the most of the hard work done by the committee in giving us a chance to get on these waters.


Cheers Boys see you soon

Cookie

Hampton Springs Meadow 29/4/18

GREENGRASS  GREENFIELD GIVES THE FIELD A LICKING AT HAMPTON

18 of Eggy Ferry's finest made the trip to Hampton today. Though the fishing was hard The weather held off and there were some Hampton Lumps to be had if you could get them in.
When getting to our pegs most people noticed that the water was very clear which is not a good sign.
Housey informed us that the temperature on Friday and Saturday night had dropped to 2 deg C .Maybe that was was put the fish down ?, we will never know.
This weeks Hero at Hampton was John Greenfield . On peg 15 with Dennis and Spadger in his section John must of thought  " how can I beat these two legends ? "
He had little to worry about a they both fished like Bellends to give John the section money and 1st place on the day .From what I could see John caught most of his fish shallow at around 14.5 m on pellet and weighed in 38-03 for the win.
For Dennis this week there was no end peg and it told . 5 hours of Dennis's commentary on the experience of almost blanking was too much for some and singing the Dinker Donker Danker chorus was the only way to alleviate the ear ache for a few.
In second place today in section A was the Helmet of Hampton aka Sumo. A varied approach of feeder , down the track and shallow brought 31-14 to the net and was enough for the section.
In third place was Tony Trainor with Les and Terry in his section he managed 29-14 for the money. John fished long all day for his fish , o well done Tony.
In B section Kenny Stuart , Paul Robbo and Andy Lawton fought it out and Andy proved to be the winner with 25-12 beating the club eye candy Paul by a mere 5 ounces .
In C section Brisso , Nicko and Houso battled it out and despite venue expert Nicko being in the section Housey repeated last weeks section winning performance by catching 29-09 , Well in Housey.
In D Section Patto ,Eric and Cookie all caught unsteadily  and it was only the 2 carp caught down the edge by Patto in the first 10 minutes that separated the trio . 23-15 from Mr Mirth was enough to put more money into the Mirth Mobile on the way home.
Glad to see Robbo out again and despite him having Patto drooling over him all day I hope he enjoyed his day out with the Eggy Helmets.
So in Summary

1st John Greenfield
2nd Sumo
3rd Tony Tainor

Section
A Sumo
B Andy
C Housey
D Patto
E John G
F Tony

Finally a little gem most of you may have missed but it tickled me.
Dennis was talking to Spadger about his family hiring a big country house for a get together.
A comment drifted across the lake from peg 7 which was " That will be a Dolls House then Den "
Classic

Cheers Boys see you soon

Cookie

THE CUNNERIES CANAL 22/4/18

THE KING IS DEAD !!!!!     LONG LIVE THE KING

On the morning of 22nd April 2018 it was announced that the most famous dwarf in the world Mini Me had passed away.

RIP VERNE TROYER





















However by early afternoon the same day another member of the knee high club was proclaimed King of the Little people .

Arise King Dennis Jones and take a bow.

13 Eggy members made the trip and while waiting for breakfast we were treated to a torrential downpour which lasted for at least an hour into the match .The end pegs were put into a section of 4 and three sections of 3 from the people who were " Blocked In " fought it out.
As you may have guessed already it was Dennis the club umpalumpa who triumphed. With a continual out pour of bullshit throughout the match regarding losing fish , cant get a bite etc the medical midget put 81-11lb on the scales to win the match .Second today was Davey H who on another of the end pegs pulled out 66-13lb ,  close but no cigar Davey.
In third place was the self proclaimed Lord of Lingmere , Prince of Partidge aka Sumo.
His 53-06lb was also enough to win B Section
I find it impossible not to comment on his modesty when naming himself with titles indicating he is in the Elite Anglers club of the northwest and not just a Club Angler like the rest of us
I have a few titles I would like to bestow on Sumo , I think these may be better suited.
The Wanker of Whiteacres
The Turd of Tunnel Barn
The Helmet of Hampton
The Log of Lathoms
The Gobshite of the Glebe
I will let you use your own imagination to find out what his title is at The Cunneries.
In the sections Housey making a rare appearance dominated C Section catching mainly up in the water from the off to total 38-15lb and leave Brisso and Cookie to watch in awe.Well done Housey. In the final section Terry was the victor . The weight advantage Patto and Les had over him was was ineffectual in the section of weightwatchers and 44-03lb was enough for the money.
All in all it was a good days fishing with plenty of fish for all. The main baits were Pellet , Maggot and corn .Few carp were caught but big F1's and decent skimmers were abundant.
Fishing long , down the track and in the margins later on all produced and it finally looks like the warmer weather will improve the fishing all around.

So in Summary

1st Dennis  81-11
2nd Davey H 66-13
3rd The C*** of the Cunneries Sumo 53-06

Sections
A Dennis
B Sumo
C Housey
D Terry

Cheers Boys see you soon

Cookie

Hall Lane Merlins 10/9/17

Gents

Blog this week courtesy of Sumo
Obviously unfunny and another example of his quest for world domination at being in charge of everything




Hall Lane Merlins - Results 10/9/17. 11 members made the trip today in cold, blustery and wet conditions. Top dog was the back to 'awesome' Sumo (aka your's truly) with 53lb 6oz of mainly carp with the odd skimmer. Nearly all caught on the banjo, I was amazed that the other anglers who struggled on the long pole were amazed at how windy it was. Never heard of weather forecasts?? 😂😂. Second was Lee Pickup with a very close 52lb 21oz. Lee must have had a briliant last two hours having claimed he didn't have a bite for the first three🙄🙄🙄. Third was the legend that is John 'Buck' Rodgers with 46lb dead all caught down the track. Sections were Sumo, Lee, and the medical experiment called Harrop Senior with 36lb dead. Just goes to show what a cardio-vascular system full of formaldehyde can do on a cold day. Amusement on the day was provided by Pato. All his rigs appeared to be too short for the depth of his peg so he decided that the best approach would be to shallow his swims up with pots and pots of groundbait. After 3 hours this started to bear fruit and he managed a creditable 3rd in a 4 man section having got through £30 quids worth of Sensas finest. Will he never learn???? See you all the Meadlowlands on Friday.

Don't worry I will be back in action soon so be ready Fat C****

Cheers

Cookie

Info for weekend away breakfast friday

Gents

Sumo has sent some info for those wanting a breakfast before we start on Friday


Final instructions / advice for the weekend away. For those you who didn't see Colin's post there is an Asda about 3 miles from Meadowlands. Address is Abbey Park, London Road, Coventry, CV3 4AR. If you want breakfast try to get there for 7.30 which means leaving about 5.30 using the M6 toll road. For those of you planning to use the M6 through birmingham, we'll see you about 3pm

Cheers

Cookie


 😂😂

LINGMERE 13/8/17

BUCKO – A hell of a nice guy and a handsome chap to boot .

Bucko charmed the field today at Lingmere .Being nominated by Nicky as the nicest and best looking angler Eggy Ferry has to offer. He used his rugged looks and smooth talking suaveness to help batter the field while still making them feel happy to be twatted by such a nice guy .

Rock’s     Bucko’s approach was to fish around 6m using 4mm pellet and feeding micros . The result was 100-02 lb       of mainly F1’s  and a few carp from peg 19.

This was enough to win the match and cement his position as the clubs most consistent performer and all round really nice guy.

There were a few star names out today including Tony Wilson and Dennis .With Bucko the bookies favourite Tony and Dennis put up a spirited fight but came short at the weigh in .

Dennis offering regular shouts of encouragement to the rest of the field fished down the edge all day using various Mong style rigs. He was so helpful sharing his tips with us that the comment from Cookie of

 “ How much shit can be contained in such a small body “ was seconded by all.

 Only Dennis knows the answer to this one .

Dennis weighed   95-11 lb of F1’s and some proper lumps to take second  place and the section from peg 32.

Tony tried a similar approach to bucko at the start using caster but could not keep up with our blue eyed boy . However a surge over the last couple of hours fishing short with pellet on Peg 9 saw him total a weight of  92-08 lb  coming   third overall and walloping Cookie and Norman for the section win .

In A section John Bones put together 30lb to beat Eric but this was not enough as the Naked Fisherman Stevie Hudson managed to put 33lb together for the section.

In D section Kev  , Mally and Andy were pitted against each other .Andy came out on top from peg 26 .

He fished down to the left all day and put  66-00 lb   in the net for the section .This was from the same peg that Davey H won the match a few weeks ago using similar tactics .

One thing that spoiled the day was the news that Sumo and Patto had both Qualified for the Maver Match this final . However this was misleading , neither of them qualified or won fuck all as usual.

The news originated from the same source that informed us of the London Bus found on the moon many years ago in the Daily Sport .

Also not too let Sumo off the hook so easily I can now announce to all Club Members that I have sorted the scales out so we are now weighing in pounds and ounces , not pounds and 0.1 of a pound etc

This is what happens when we allow complete helmets like Sumo to be in charge of anything.

In Summary

1^st Bucko

2^nd Tony

3^rd Dennis

Sections

A Stevie Hudson  33-05

B Tony   92-08

C Bucko  102-03

D Andy  66-00

E Dennis 95-11

Cheers Boys see you soon

Cookie

PS . After I had written this blog I was informed by a reliable source that Rock Hudson was a raging Homosexual and a complete Twat – Sorry Bucko